This story, forwarded by friend Asha, actually reminded me of something I’ve been meaning to write about too. How badly we treat the ones closest to us and the lengths we go to in front of acquaintances and strangers, in order to create a good impression.
Says Asha: “Goes with my theory that we tend to treat the worst, the people who matter the most to us. Like with our parents/families/close friends — we tend to think they will never leave us, so we subject them to our worst moods, while with our colleagues/strangers we are the sweetest people ever, full of Pleases and Thank yous and Sorrys.”
So true!
What does it take, I think, to spare a kind word or two when you talk to someone close to you? Or at least be decent and not talk down, like the other person is some lowly earth form not worthy of existing.
The reason that came to mind is the fact that I have come across this kind of behaviour and though I have stopped letting it bother me anymore, I still wonder why it has to be this way. Why can’t people be a little easy with their words? Is it necessary to grind out words and sentences as if saying it in a more pleasant manner wouldn’t get them restful sleep? Is it necessary to pass acerbic comments just because that person happens to be related to you and that for some reason gives you the authority to tread all over him/her?
I think we treat those close to us quite badly. It’s not necessary to say sweet things all the time (especially when you don’t mean them) but it costs nothing to say things in a pleasant manner.
And when I read this story, this last line really rang true: “To be honest I still find it hard to believe that the person, Sweetie, who wrote such wonderful things to me on the internet, is actually the same woman I married and who has not said a nice word to me for years.”
It’s so possible I think. I see it happening around me and I’m sure you have too.
So next time, you’re tempted to lash out at your parents, siblings, grandparents, cousins, aunts, uncles etc. — do stop for a moment and take a deep breath and ask yourself if it’s really necessary. Most times, you’ll realise that it’s not.
“I have spread my dreams under your feet;
Tread softly because you tread on my dreams”
how very true…
Posted by kris | September 19, 2007, 1:13 pmThat’s a beautiful picture. Lovely words following too.
Thanks for sharing.
P.S: AKA SandDunes :)
Posted by Pranjal | September 20, 2007, 11:56 amtalk about life imitating art. this story reminds me of the movie “Mitr” where shobana’s character and her husband meet online and become each other’s best friend, with shobana confiding all her marital woes and problems to her husband. both of coz do not know it’s their significant other they’re actually speaking to. like true hindi movie this is revealed in the climax. the movie had a happy ending unlike the real life story though.
good post Anita!!
Posted by Aqua | September 20, 2007, 1:54 pmBeautiful post, lovely photograph. Hope to meet you in person, some day Anita. Yes, Kit-Kat also.
Posted by Lubna | September 21, 2007, 1:43 pm@ sathish: :)
@ Pranjal: SandDunes identity revealed? thanks :)
@ aqua: thanks! yes, i remember that movie. but all ended well there unlike in this case :)
@ Lubna: thanks! of course. we shall definitely meet!
Posted by Anita | September 21, 2007, 2:31 pmAgree, agree, agree. And guess what it hurts me more when someone close to me does that while I couldn’t care less if a stranger said the same.
and lovely picture as usual. :)
Posted by Usha | September 26, 2007, 4:44 pmThought provoking story
And very true to young generation.
Toe ring is pretty!
Posted by Paavani | September 27, 2007, 1:11 pmI write about this all the time. About how we have time and manners for everyone except those who really matter.
Posted by the mad momma | October 5, 2007, 10:07 pmLoved this picture.
Posted by pria | October 18, 2007, 9:50 pmHey Anita,
Truer words were never said and I so agree with this :)
Posted by Kits | October 23, 2007, 2:24 pmgreat picture!
–Rahul
Posted by rahul | October 29, 2007, 7:46 pmgreat post!
sooo true with me…
Posted by prajeesh | October 30, 2007, 7:56 pmNice comment.
I think you’ll check out our page..
Thanks
Posted by Be a Good Daughter | November 13, 2007, 1:03 am